Closure: It's all about You

This weekend I got a surprising text in the middle of the night from my former significant other. My two year relationship ended at the beginning of this summer, so to say that this text was a surprise would be an understatement. Really for one of the first times in my life, I was pretty speechless. In being completely honest, I would have done anything for that text message a few months ago but the way I reacted showed me how far I've come. To break it down, he was reaching out and looking for closure, something that I had wanted all summer. Over the summer I had wanted to sit down with him, talk about it together and figure out what the split really meant. In that text he was asking for the same thing, to figure it out together, but what I've come to realize is that closure after a relationship isn't about the both of you anymore. It's not about talking out why it ended and continuing as friends. It's just about you. It's about you, individually finding admiration of the past, acceptance of the ending and ultimately it's about finding yourself and moving towards your own individual future.

It takes some time, it does. It's hard to wholly love yourself again after someone stops loving those little things in you. You no longer have that safety blanket to run to. You have to learn to build that trust and confidence in yourself and you have to learn that you can handle it all on your own.

I loved dating someone long distance for two years of my college career and I will never say otherwise however I am happy that it is not continuing.You know, sometimes we outgrow relationships and it's okay. I'm lucky that he was able to see what I couldn't: our relationship wasn't perfect. I can honestly say that I think I've grown more in the past five months than I have during my two years of college combined. Why? Because I've truly been making independent decisions. I'm the one making my decisions solely for me, planning my time solely for me and loving solely me. I feel more me than ever. I get to focus on the things that make me, and only me, happy. I get to direct my future towards my own goals and I don't have to sacrifice and compromise my dreams and aspirations.

So yes, it is a few months of battling but the result is beautiful and oh so rewarding. No one ever said it was easy, but I'm telling you it's worth it. There are little steps along the way to remind you that you can handle it and that really you're doing okay. For me, it was throwing a gifted bracelet off a boat in Paris that was truly liberating. Maybe for you it's burning old photos or simply dying your hair a crazy color but closure is all about you and your progress and ultimately, your acceptance. The hard part is that you can only get there by yourself. But you know what? It feels pretty great to be able to text him back and tell him that.

What do you think about closure? Have you ever dealt with this after a breakup?
Emily

Find Your Sunset

Any time I see a sunset I whip out my phone and take a picture of it. It's definitely one of the cheesier things that I do but I can't resist. They're truly one of my favorite things in this world. Yesterday as I was taking the photo below, I got asked by a friend why I always take so many pictures of sunsets and my answer was pretty simple. I figured I'd share my answer with you all as well.

{See this on my Instagram}

So why sunsets? 

Well, it's because they give me something to smile about. In the middle of a busy and stressful day they make me me stop and think of all of the beautiful little things around me that are more important than the work ahead of me. On the flip side, after a long and perfect day, they're simply the cherry on top. Sunsets with friends are as picturesque as it comes, but a sunset alone is just as internally satisfying. Every once in a while we need something to make us pause and simply take our breath away. Sunsets give me that inspiration daily and the truly gorgeous ones I will always want to capture. So I'll keep going through the trouble to drag my phone out and take a picture of every sunset I see because its my daily documentation of the more important things in life. For me it's all about the little things, and life will always be about the little things.

What is your sunset? What's the little thing that makes you smile?
Emily

#FridayFinds: The Carters Killed It!

So if you know me, you'd know I'm a huge Beyoncé fan. Well, I mean, how could you not be? But this  video just magnified my love for the Carters 10-fold. This is their final performance of their last concert on their On the Run Tour. Really though, can you say power-couple? Not only did they kill it throughout the entire tour but this last song gave me goosebumps. Their home videos put those summer divorce rumors to shame and put a smile on my own face looking at baby Blue Ivy! Take a rest on this Friday and watch this killer performance.

So much love for the Carters,
Emily

So Here's the Thing About the "Selfie"...

So this year the word "selfie" got added to the dictionary. Now when I'm talking selfie, I don't mean the awkward solo photo of you standing in front of some great historic monument, I mean the full blown self-ie. Arm out, phone tilted sideways parallel to your 45 degree head tilt, wide eyes and even wider mouth. *see below* This can be taken with one or more people.

 {Selfie at the Bean in Chicago!}

To me, they will forever be awkward but I am totally guilty of them anyways. My thing is, if it makes you happy, or feel pretty, beautiful, smart, sexy, funny, or goofy, DO IT. If taking that selfie with your best friends in the front row of the concert makes you look back in years and smile about that awesome night then do it. By all means, take twenty. If taking that mirror picture of "the outfit of the day" makes you feel like the office supermodel then do it. 

Maybe you're sending it to all 2,435 of your Facebook friends, maybe you're sending it to your bff over snap chat, maybe it's to your SO at another school or maybe its destined to simply sit in your camera roll to mark that Tuesday that you were looking HAWT. It. Doesn't. Matter. 

So yeah, to me, selfies will forever be awkward but girl, snap away and keep on smiling. Rock the selfie and rock that confidence too.

What do you think of the selfie?
Emily

Fall Means Leaves, Chai and Scarves!!!

It's that time of year again, no really! It's the second day of Fall! I love that the brisk weather is setting in, football is now my Saturday afternoons, Chai is always on the table and the scarves are coming out of storage! Scarves are one of the beauties of fall. They easily accessorize outfit and also switch up your  clothing options. A simple white tshirt is completely transformed with a plaid scarf and no one will remember your outfit repeat next week when you pair it with solid red one! 

This is one of my favorite scarves that I own. I got it as a present from my brother and it is my school colors! Perfect to pair with a dress for tailgating!

I am a self-proclaimed scarf addict but with cute scarves so cheap why wouldn't I be? Check out these super affordable options from {Charming Charlie} and {Forever 21}! They're all under $15! Grab a few and spruce up tomorrow's outfit, and the next day and the next day! 

Are you a scarf person? Where do you find affordable scarves?

Emily