Today is my last day of classes before Spring Break. Well scratch that, I'm currently in my last class before Spring Break. Whoops. "Pilgrimages & Crusades were a source of
funding for building Romanesque churches." … Obviously I'm having difficulties focusing. I just can't wait. I don't have any crazy Spring Break plans nor do I really want to. My cat, home cooking and a couch is really calling my name. I'm not someone who really gets home sick but I definitely need some time with my family. I need some time without a day scheduled around work and I need some time with my guy. Fact about Emily: I'm in a long distance relationship while at school. So that's really about most of the time. Needless to say, breaks are a little bit of heaven. Weekends are great but a whole week, I can't explain what that feels like. Keeping this minimally cheesy, let's just say I'm pumped.
So parents, brother, boyfriend, cats, and couch. What more could I ask for?
Well I could ask for the next 20 minutes of art history to go away but I guess I can deal.
So this week has been Midterms. And they have been, well, absolutely horrible. The tests themselves haven't gone bad (I actually have gotten As on two of them so far! Happy dance!). However, I've only done well because I've been studying my a$$ off. Excuse my french.
Needless to say I've been stressing a little. Well, stressing a lot, a whole lot. Hours and hours and more hours of studying can really take a toll. My freshmen year I really struggled with taking care of myself when trying to balance all of my commitments. I was spreading myself really thin. I had a large time commitment to college tennis, I was a new member in my sorority, I was getting the most out of my new college social life and I was still squeezing in my homework between 11 and 4 am every night.
It was killing me. Not only were my grades not where I wanted to be but I was getting 3-4 hours of sleep a night. At the time I thought it was normal, being constantly tired, constantly sick and constantly behind on homework. After some reevaluation and deciding what I truly found rewarding and what my true goals were I decided to focus more on studies and more on Me.
To do this I had to leave behind a commitment that I had enjoyed since I was 5. This honestly was the toughest decision that I have ever made in my life. It was a decision that I had been debating over a year but finally everything came to a head - my grades were at an all time low, I spent an entire semester fighting sickness, I was losing valuable relationships due to traveling and I was not happy.
This was so tough. When I finally gained the courage to approach my parents it became days and days of discussion and even more nights of crying trying to figure out what the right decision was.
Ultimately, I decided to quit tennis and I have absolutely no regrets. Tennis had become the source of all of my stress. Missing classes for traveling trips, breaks filled with more travel, morning practices, one-on-one sessions scheduled in between classes, drama with the lineup, the struggle to balance my grades and the disappointment when I couldn't maintain my commitments to the level that I wanted.
I had, have, so much history with that court. I met some of my best friends on those white lines, friends that will be bridesmaids at my wedding. I learned the values of honesty with every line call, drive and determination with practice, and more importantly I learned how to lose with poise. I learned a good handshake and I learned how to be assertive when the calls weren't fair. I learned the importance of preparation as well as the importance of reflection. I learned how to look a coach in the eye and I learned what 17s were. Very quickly. I learned of the rewards and enjoyment that I gained from pushing my body to its limits. I also learned of "RICE" and this was implemented frequently. I learned how to set goals and I learned how to make plans to reach them. Most of all, I learned what success was and I became addicted.
I had my fair share of success in the game. Honestly, I had more of my fair share and I worked hard to get it. I graduated as the #1 player in the state for two consecutive years and I came into college as the #1 recruit in the conference. When I decided to quit I was #1 on the team and the team captain.
That was me. But that also became the way that people would define me. Whenever I would see old friends they'd ask how tennis was going. I was always wanting them to ask me about my internships, ask about my schoolwork and what I wanted to do, ask about my family or just ask me how my day was. I loved this success and I miss everyday being able to say (6-0, 6-0) but it was one of those forking moments in life and I know I made the right decision. Tennis used to be a place where I could relieve all of my stress, where I could kick some ass and where I felt at home but it changed. And I truly am not bitter, I just think I'm growing up. I'm more determined than ever to work hard, my grades are higher than I ever wold have thought they could be, I'm getting to enjoy time with some of my best friends, I'm getting normal amounts of sleep and most of all I am happy. It might sound cheesy but I've come to the conclusion that happiness is really all that matters. As long as I'm happy I can figure the rest out from there.
I may have cried a little writing this but I think it's a combination of really missing kicking people's asses, my complete bliss for having a 4.0 at midterms and the realization that I really am growing up. I'm living on cloud 9 right now and I plan on setting up shop here for a while.
So yesterday we had a snow day. A snow day. In March. In Memphis.
Either way, I'll take it. Waking up to the brightness of the snow outside is one of those "little things". I always remember doing secret tribal dances in my room when I was in elementary school praying to the snowday gods that my school would close. I did even try the pajamas inside out trick. I'm also happy to say that the one time I tried this it did work. Although I don't typically spend the day sledding and creating elaborate 4 feet snowmen in the backyard I still love these days. Playing around in the snow (now mainly consisting of walking around in the covered grass) is something that I will never get tired of.
Despite my hopes that the weather will warm up as soon as possible, I loved yesterday. It also was a much needed respite on a Monday. I could use more mondays off to sit in my room and drink a hot chai. And obviously a cake pop. If you give a mouse a cookie right?
So snow days are good and snow days will always be good. Thanks snowday gods, stay tuned for more tribal dances to come.
Recently I've been applying for scholarships and internships for this coming summer. First off I think its semi sad that I'm so focused and determined to get internships over the summer instead of planning the days I'm going to the pool. I can honestly count the number of times I was at the pool this past summer on one hand. Easy to say I wasn't very tan. Then again, it does feel pretty good and honestly rewarding to have a "real-people" job in an office.
Due to this need for experience (and mainly money) this past week has been a little stressful with all of the March 1st-3rd deadlines. Anyways, in doing this I've come to the conclusion that I'm pretty impressed with my drive and willingness to work hard in order to get my dream job. I was designing business cards last night, I'm not sure if I should be ashamed of that or proud.
For one of my internship applications I had to provide a Curriculum Vitae. Firstly, I'm prefacing this with, I had to look up what that was… Secondly, most of the samples I looked at were in other languages. Twas a task looking for an English version. By the end of the day however I had successfully completed this document and I'm actually excited about it!
So long story short, I think I can deal with this growing up thing. Although I'm missing pool time, I'm currently feeling a little accomplished and definitely driven. I can handle this.
So as I'm typing this there is sleet coming down outside. The sidewalk is already covered and all I can think of is the fact that we have pin attire tomorrow.
So what does that mean?
Business attire, in the sleet. That's always a fun combination.
These are the days that I truly have nothing to wear.
Dressing in the cold is an impossible task. There are four possibilities of winter dressing:
Option A. You look great. Red lips, houndsooth dress, tights and riding boots. Compliments all day but by the time you get back home your knees are bright red and shaking and your hair just might have frozen off.
Option B. You're so bundled up you look like the little boy from A Christmas Story in your floor length puffer coat. Eskimo can be trendy I guess…?
Option C. You throw on the lulu lemon fleece tights, tall uggs, your boyfriend's worn in sweatshirt, a patagonia and call it a day. You're sacrificing a little bit of heat for a lotta bit of style but you're out of the house on this snowy day so that's got to count for something right?!
Either way, it's a task.
I'm determined tomorrow to look like a million bucks. Okay maybe not a million bucks but lets at least good enough that I could instagram the outfit and possibly get a few likes.
Here's some of the inspiration I've been looking at for tomorrow.
Hope it can spark some ideas for your chilly days too!
I'm a sucker for bean boots and tights. Not only are they practical but they give a formal outfit a more whimsical 2nd grade going-to-school feel. And honestly, I'm all for that.
That dress. Those shoes. I mean those legs. This girl's got it.
I'm not typically a fan of the Over-the-knee boots but with that coat it really takes the edge off. She's less Pretty Woman and more Serena Van der Woodson and I can really dig it.
This would be a stretch for me but I really am dying to try a beany. Hopefully soon I'll whip out the curling iron and give it a go. I'll keep you posted...
I think I just fell in love with these pants. Fitted to perfection and they look festively warm. Plus, this girl's got guts.
I think this is what I'm going for. The mixture of textures with an overall cozy feel. I could go through a whole day of classes in that sweater, not to mention that skirt. Oh, and I'm definitely thinkin bean boots.
.png)
.png)
.png)
